The last time I saw my mom was at my graduation ceremony in college. Seeing her again and watching her meet her grandson for the first time was absolutely wonderful. She stayed up here for three whole days. I got to go to the bathroom without poking my head out the door to check on Chris. Not feeling tethered to him for over twenty-four hours blew my mind.
Milestones & Changes
Chris turned six months on Mother’s Day. I couldn’t believe how big he’d gotten since we first met in the delivery room. And what a roller coaster ride it’s juggling a full time job and childcare with my husband! Neither of our parents live nearby so getting free time for ourselves isn’t easy. The first two days I hung around as my mother bonded with her grandbaby. She absolutely loved being around him. Having raised four of her own and two ograndchildren already, mom stepped in to give us new parents a big break.
May 12th also marked a little over a year since Javier and I married. I still have both my engagement ring and my marriage band. Javier still has his band too. He loses things all. the. time. In celebration of our anniversary, I wanted us to do something special like renewing our vows but we never wrote any in the first place. Going out for sushi turned out better.
My mom adores her son-in-law so whenever I complained about trouble in paradise, she told me to go easy on him. First time parents go through rough patches. Everything is new and things change. We no longer listen to music with both earbuds in. Every time there’s silence we’re worried about Chris. Is he breathing? Is he breathing normal? Am I breathing?
Struggling = Adulting
I took as many notes as possible when she guided me on feeding Chris solid foods. Her expertise and patience made me feel like a little girl all over again. Then I thought about all the silly things I had done as a child. Chasing birds into the middle of the street, burning myself on the heater, sticking play-doh or coins in my mouth, crying over the tiniest things. Mom put up with all of that without asking for a single thing in return. I know I wouldn’t be where I am today without her.
I felt like such an adult driving my mom and Chris around to the store or McDonald’s. It was humbling when I couldn’t open the baby’s stroller. My mom and I struggled with that stroller outside the grocery store parking lot for a full ten minutes while Chris sat in the back of the car crying. I had to video chat with Javier to find out that I didn’t take the safety latch off the darn thing.
If opening a stroller was challenging, I can’t imagine what dealing with a baby running around all over the place would look like. My mom told me to “just wait.” It’s a scary thought but at the same time it’s something to look forward to. The strength to carry on even through my hardest days came from my mother. Life can throw what it wants in my face, I know my mom is just a phone call away.
Saying Hello, Saying Goodbye
Dropping mom off at the airport two years ago was such a relief. She helped me pack up my dorm and move into a house I shared with two other graduates from the same school. This time felt completely different. I now have a man-child and a growing baby on my hands. Mom wished us the best and caught her flight back home safely. Meanwhile I’m crying buckets of tears in the car. I didn’t realize how much help I needed until I got it. Being a mother is a lot of hard work that has so many rewards and responsibilities. For three days I got to share that beautiful burden with my mom and we connected on a different level.
By far the best moments I had was cooking for my mom while she got to spend time with Chris. He certainly liked all the attention! His face when he looked at me and my mom was hilarious. Can’t wait to see what he does when my twin sister is in the same room. Maybe the whole gang will get together next year.
My goal is to continue to have my mother involved in my baby’s life. The distance between us is no barrier. Chris has family in Mexico too. I can’t wait to have him meet Javier’s mother. Whatever it takes to have my son aware of all the people who love him! Being a new mother has given me a better outlook on life and it’s motivated me to stay connected with my family.
Happy Mothers Day~